And here’s a new entry, this time sent by our fellow Compiuter. This game takes on the character of unknown (named MAN ingame, he must be quite macho), who has to follow the yellow brick road to get a diamond for reasons unknown (probably ’cause diamods are worth a lot of money, we presume). The thing is that the road is incredibly wide, so wide it takes the whole Spectrum screen save from the bottom two lines. You have to move the character accross the screen, or the yellow brick road, and get the diamond, which is at the opposite side of the screen. Of course, this can prove to be impossible, as nasty coloured blocks will appear everywhere on screen to block your path. If you find yourself trapped, you don’t have anything else to do but suicide. Hash, but real, as in life itself.

Tiny graphics, blank scenery, an out of tune set of beeps which make for a intro tune, and a complete lack of design make for a really high crap factor. The sad thing is that I’ve seen products just like this for sale back in the 80s. Ah, those were good times!

Summary

O, P, Q, A – character movement
S – suicide

Click here to download.

Dr. BEEP sends in a great update to Numberguessing, this time correctly taylored for the year 2011, with the needed adaptations. Time goes faster in 2011 than in 1982 (I must remember to ask my physician friend about this), so the game is adapted to such fact. In fact, the game is so well written that you will guess the number rather quickly.

Not even an attempt to customize the screen colours makes a high crap factor. Using INPUT A$ to make the program stop until the player press ENTER is just ace. The game asks you to guess a number within two random boundaries and even warns you if you get out of bounds! Quality!

Here we have a great contender this year. Shape it up, boys, this one is tough!

Summary

Numbers – choose number.
ENTER – enter.

Click here to download.

This is an entry which may help us on our task of being the judges to the CSSCGC this year providing proper training (through simmulation). It’s set in the year 4011, but I think that won’t matter that much. Will you be a crap judge or a good judge of crapness? And, we ask, in the CSSCGC, what’s more appropiate? Let’s hope time will tell. Meanwhile, let’s have a shot at this game.

This game is an updated version of the good old Crap Games Competition 3009 – The Adventure which competed on the 2009 edition, by the same author.

The game let’s you choose which judge you want to be (including the possibility of being GOD, the judge for the upcoming CSSCGC 4011, or Vah-Ka the Almighty for year unknown). Then, it describes ten games which you must judge. Use your wisdom on the task, don’t rush! At the end, you have to select a winner. The program allows you to repeat the experience (perhaps choosing to incarnate a different judge) at the end by typing RUN and tapping ENTER.

This game gets extra points for including Vah-Ka the Almighty, of course.

Summary

Keyboard – used to type.

Click here to download.

Here we have a pure survival horror genre game. A exploding mine sends you thru time and space (we all know that exploding mines tend to do such a thing). When you open your eyes you find yourself confined inside four walls (whether there’s a ceiling or not it’s not specified) with five angry looking aliens chasing you. Why such aliens respected you while you were sleeping is uncertain, though. With no weapons, all you can do is scape. Well, you can also use harsh language at will.

The game comes with a neat tune you can’t skip (even though the screen is captioned with a message telling you to press C to start) for higher crap factor. The graphics are tiny and dull, but, to be honest, I never witnessed a better rendition of an alien in 8×8 pixels. Good job!

Summary

O, P, Q, A – Character movement
M – Use harsh language

Click here to download.

As it says in the full title, the fast paced coockery game! You control some kind of scotching device around the screen using they keyboard and your goal is to wrap the hard boiled egg presented in a tasty meat envelope. Well, the game may be fast, but the it surely allows you to stop from time to time to think about your approach on scotching the egg, which is a good thing.

There is absolutely no documentation about which keys you must use to control the scotching tool whatsoever, so this adds for a good crap factor. And I’m not telling you, I don’t wanna spoil a bit of fun.

The best part about this game is that it’s one of those proggies which are clearly designed to psycologically uncover your true inner self, something that has made some people tons of money with modern games such as Fable 2. When the time is over, the game just asks how good you did your task. Now it’s up to you to decide whether to be honest or to lie like a parrot. It’s your call.

The game comes in two versions: English and ununderstandable Spanish, so the Spanish chums can enjoy the full experience if they can make sense of the translation.

Summary

Keys: I won’t tell.

Click here to download.

Here’s the first entry to this year’s compo. Well, it’s not an actual entry, it’s just a very old game I made myself when I was a kid and that I found in a dusty tape. Its title, Run for Syrums, is pretty descriptive. You have to run until you get to the city of Syrums. You have to mash your O and P keys to achieve it, of course. But it ain’t that easy: a boulder is chasing you, so you have to run and not stop until you clear get to your destination. Besides, “someone” (probably somebody from Syrums who is not very kind of your arrival) is throwing stones against you, which you’ll need to dodge. Use the SPACE key to jump.

The game is pretty playable but comes with a good plethora of crap items: first of all, it’s completely in Spanish. Second, it will look weird if loaded in 128K mode, so make sure you switch to 48K mode before loading the game. And last, but not least, it comes with a nice password protection (against piracy?). To play the game you have to enter the password, which is kikko, and which will only work in lower case. Nice, uh?

Head for the download link. It comes with sources in a Z80 file and a couple of weird goodies inside.

Summary

Mash O and P to run.
Hit Space to jump.
The password is kikko.

Click here to download.

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